A Labor Day Thank You to the Republican Party

Union OrganizersAs we enjoy this holiday dedicated to the men and women, mostly our grandparents, who sacrificed and worked through union organizations to build the lives we enjoy today, let’s also not forget the top 3 contributions made by the republican party:

  1. ______________________________
  2. ______________________________
  3. ______________________________

I guess they’re still working on it. They’ve got an invisible army of “secret job creators” just ready to create good middle class jobs. Who are these “job creators”? What are their names? What are they waiting for? Why not just hold a press conference and introduce them? Maybe because they don’t exist? Here are some additional questions:

  1. What jobs are they going to create? We’d like to know so that we can check our resumés and update our skills if necessary.
  2. Where will these jobs be located? Let us know so that we can relocate if it’s worth it.
  3. How much will these jobs pay? We need to know so we can decide if it’s worth investing in new training or education.
  4. What will the benefits be? Of course there will be health insurance, paid vacations, paid education benefits, paid holidays…no?

Are the republican just full of shit? That would explain why they keep their mouths shut every Labor Day weekend and hide in shame. Maybe when they come out of hiding after Labor Day weekend they can answer those questions?

 

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Celebrating Labor Day 2013

unionlaborLabor Day “is dedicated to the social and economic achievements of American workers. It constitutes a yearly national tribute to the contributions workers have made to the strength, prosperity, and well-being of our country” according to the Department of Labor. Read more of the history of Labor Day here.

As we take time off on this last weekend of the summer we owe a debt of gratitude to organized labor for this time off. You wouldn’t have this day off otherwise. Business has never been the friend to American families. Though some may not support organized labor you won’t see them refusing any of the benefits these efforts have brought including summer vacations and the long Labor Day holiday weekend.

As a former president of the World Bank noted, “Strong unions have helped to reduce inequality, whereas weaker unions have made it easier for CEOs, sometimes working with market forces that they have helped shape, to increase it.” As the productivity of the American worker has increased over the past 30 years any thought of being rewarded has gone down. That benefit now comes in the form of executive salaries and bonuses. It’s time to reverse that 30 year effort lead by the Republican Party.

Whether you are in a union or not the standard of living in America was raised by working men and women. Remember who to thank for your weekend with your family and remember who would like to take it away from you. Vote.

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Weekend of Republican Shame 2013

Weekend of Republican Shame 2013 is less than two weeks away!!! AKA Labor Day mapleleafWeekend, it’s the only American holiday where the members of an entire political party have absolutely nothing to be proud of and we want to make sure they enjoy that distinction. The good thing is that for the entire weekend they must keep their mouths shut, or better yet, just get out of the country. Here’s a link to travel in Canada, if they’ll take you? Make your plans now, do us all a favor and get out! How ’bout it my Canadian friends…need any scabs?

Canadian Travel plans: http://us-keepexploring.canada.travel/

For those who may be interested we have negotiated a special deal with Holiday Inn Canada. These special rates include your accommodations and all services provided at a special “third world” level of expertise. And remember, they don’t always speak English in Canada. It’s not the native language. Learn theirs you moron.

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America’s “Fuck the Republican Party” Anthem

Let’s all sing together!

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The Beginnings of Republican Lying

The average American doesn’t want to be educated; he doesn’t want to improve his mind; he doesn’t even want to work, consciously, at being a good citizen.

“The Lie Factory” was published in the Sept. 24, 2012 of the New Yorker. The success of the Lie Factory has long depended on the truth in the above quote.

http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/2012/09/24/120924fa_fact_lepore

This article details what is considered to be the first ever company dedicated to campaign consulting called simply Campaigns, Inc. It was founded in 1933 by Leone Baxter and Clem Whitaker pictured below.

The Lie Factory

The Lie Factory

Their first victim was Upton Sinclair who was running for governor of California in 1934. Every day on page one of the Los Angeles Times they posted  what appeared to be a Sinclair quote. Rather, it was a quote from one of his fiction novels and taken out of context. Quoting directly from the article:

“Upton was beaten,” Whitaker later said, “because he had written books.” And, so, those boxes in the L.A. Times:

SINCLAIR ON MARRIAGE:
The sanctity of marriage. . . . I have had such a belief . . . I have it no longer.

The excerpt, as Sinclair explained in “How I Got Licked,” was taken from a passage in his 1911 novel, “Love’s Pilgrimage,” in which one character writes a heartbroken letter to a man having an affair with his wife. Continue reading

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You got a friend on FaceBook!!

 Let the rock fight begin!!

Connect on Facebook

Send me a friend request.

Let’s get some shit going on FaceBook!

Yes, it’s me Johnny Shitterowski alive an kickin’ on Facebook. Got myself on Facebook. Check it out, send me a friend request. Let’s have some god damn fun!

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Johnny Shitterowski’s New Book

Go Out and Do Something Good for Someone Other Than Yourself and Shut Up!

Following the success of such motivational books as The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren and Stephen R. Covey’s The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People Johnny Shitterowski is working on his own book. The title of this book is Go Out and Do Something Good for Someone Other Than Yourself and Shut Up!

According to Johnny Shitterowski, Shitski to his friends, the most important part is to shut up! It doesn’t make any sense at all, according to Shitski, to do something for someone and then brag about it or accept honors for it because you’re really doing it so you can feel good about yourself. Or worse, to compensate for being a miserable prick to friends, neighbors, and employees. According to the book, no matter how much you give it won’t help you. What you need is a good kick in the balls by your lowest paid employees.

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Happy New Year from Fat Rats Ass!

Predictions for 2012

Predictions for 2012

We over here at Fat Rats Ass want to wish all our friends a Happy New Year!! Here at Fat Rats Ass we have gotten busy compiling all the statistics, facts, and figures in preparation for awarding our annual honor of the Most Miserable State in America.

This prestigious award is based on five measures of the social condition as ranked by nationally known organizations: education, health, wages, unemployment, and bankruptcy. Each of the states are ranked from worst to first and then color coded red or blue based on how that state voted in the last presidential election. You don’t want to be at the top of this list. Most of all you don’t want to congressional delegation from the top 10 states influencing politics and bringing their talent for leadership to your state. Continue reading

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Clash of the Republican Wife Cheaters

The battle of the republican wife cheaters has finally ended with Newt “Back Door Man

Herman Can't Remember

I Don't Remeber

Gingrich beating out Herman “Masher” Cain. It started out simple enough and nobody but nobody saw this battle coming. It began when Herman “Masher” Cain was accused of having an affair and he replied that he could not remember a thing about it.

Newt "Back Door Man" Gingrich

"He's lying", said Back Door Man Gingrich.

Hearing this Newt “Back Door Man” Gingrich began a rumor that the Masher was lying. As the circle of women gathered around Masher Cain he found it increasingly difficult get a boner and this worried a lot of women.

I Only Banged One

I Only Banged One

Thinking the best thing to do was to come clean Masher admitted to having an affair with one woman. “It was only one that I banged and I was doing her a favor. Just ask her.” Satisfied that this was the end of Masher Cain, Newt “Back Door Man” Gingrich rested easy. When, lo and behold who appears on the horizon? Is that Mr. Clean I see, no it’s Mitt Romney! Mitt accused Newt of being the biggest masher in DC. Continue reading

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Salami Swallower Michele Bachmann

Michele Bachmann Wins Sausage Swallowing Contest

Michele Bachmann wins the sausage swallowing contest at the Idaho State Fair.

Capping a tour de force of the Iowa Caucus Michele Bachmann outdid all competitors when she competed in and won the Salami Swallowing contest at the Iowa State Fair. A previously unknown talent of hers, Michele says she is a  “salami swallower from way back”. Michele eagerly two fisted the dry shriveled monstrosity and made it disappear in a salami swallowing feat not previously seen at the state fair. Salami swallowing comes naturally to Michele Bachman. It’s a talent that, she says, “you either have or you don’t and I damn sure got it. For me salami swallowing is a God given gift.” Asked if this was the biggest salami she ever swallowed she replied, “no, I’ve swallowed salami much larger but that was fresh moist salami. The salami I swallowed in the contest was too dry and scratched my throat.” Continue reading

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